Thursday, August 20, 2009

I Wonder How Much They've Grown


After I get out of work tomorrow, I will be picking up Peanut & The Champ from their mother's. Mrs. Joe had taken them to the beach and has been there since the end of last week. She has had them for almost 2 weeks. I don't think I have gone this long without seeing them.

As I have said, Mrs. Joe's family has a house on Cape Cod. We used to go out there for a week or two in the summer for our vacation. Last year, I took them by myself. Mrs. Joe had been fighting with mother about our separation.

This year she decided she would go. She didn't like the idea of me being there with her family last year. Weird thing this year was the day before she was to leave, Mrs. Joe invited me out there with them.

Um, did she forget we filed for divorce a week earlier?

She went as far as assuring me I would have to drive myself out there and that I would be sleeping on the pull out couch. Thanks, nothing says relaxing like some old lumpy mattress full of beach sand. I decided against it and told her I felt it would confuse the kids.

Besides, I had plans. I was to go with GBD up to Stowe, VT for the weekend. I had never been up there before. It was beautiful. We took the back roads home and enjoyed the views. I also got a bunch of stuff done around the house during this past week. I admit I like my free time but damn how I miss those kids.

Speaking of the divorce, I haven't gotten any word from probate court regarding a meeting with the judge. Not that it matters, I've waited this long, another month or two is nothing.

This past week or so has been fun but I can't deny I am looking forward to being a dad again.

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Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Similar, Except No Announcements In The Paper


It took over a year and a half but it is finally done.

Mrs. Joe & I filed for divorce Friday.

We used a single lawyer and filed uncontested. He mediated our divorce agreement and thankfully we were able to agree on everything. Going this route was a lot less stressful and cost much less.

I had to remortgage the house so I could buy out her half of the house and pay off a home improvement loan in both our names. We agreed that instead of child support I would pay for private school for the kids until high school. Not that I would think she would spend it foolishly but this way I know my money is going to the kids. Everything else had already been taken care of.

We met with the lawyer for the last time last Tuesday. I needed to show that the mortgage and the loan were taken care of. He had his clerk finish up the agreement and we signed the remaining paperwork. We left and had the agreements witnesses and notarized but could not file seeing the courthouse had already closed.

I left work early Friday and went to the courthouse. Of course nothing comes easy, so when the clerk asked me where our separation agreement was I realized it wasn’t included. So I had to drive back home, find the agreement, drive back to the courthouse, and wait in line but finally it was done.

We will receive a court date in September. Assuming the divorce is granted, we need to wait 120 days for it to become official. That puts things out until January.

I’m trying to look at this past Friday similarly to when I proposed to Mrs. Joe some 13 years ago. This divorce filing is like the wedding proposal and the 120th day after the hearing in front of the judge is the wedding ceremony.

I often told Mrs. Joe and others that from the day I proposed, I considered myself married and that the ceremony was a formality. Now I am trying to think that because the divorce paperwork is filed, I am divorced and the time from now until after the hearing with the judge is just a formality.

Either way, another big step is complete. I had the weekend to myself to think it over and I am happy with the decision I have made.

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