Brotherly (and Sisterly) Love
Over the years, I’ve realized my sister and I aren’t as close as most brothers and sisters. Even though we live in the same town, less than 5 miles away, we see each other only a couple times a month. We hardly talk on the phone. We will both lend a hand if asked, but I just don’t think we have the close relationship that brothers and sisters are supposed to have.
I’ve thought about it more than once. “Why do I not have that connection that we are supposed to have?” I’ve come to a few possible conclusions. We grew up in a house where our parents didn’t show much affection to each other or to us. There were never any kisses hello or goodbye and a hug was few and far between. Also, communication was difficult. Simple family conversations over dinner never happened. My dad was often not home. With my mom, the TV was more important. My parents rarely explained any life lessons to us so we were on our own, usually going outside the house to learn. You can imagine the results there.
With this in mind, probably to a fault, I am focused on my son’s relationship with his sister. I want them both to have a relationship that I do not have with my sister. I can’t count the number of times tried to get The Champ to be the “big brother” to his little sister.
"Champ, give your sister a kiss goodnight."
"Champ, take Peanut’s hand", as we walk across a parking lot.
"Champ, watch your sister for a minute" as I run outside for a second.
Or trying to explain to him, when he yells at his sister after she separates Annie from Clarabel, "She doesn’t understand. You have to be patient."
Although they are both young, there are glimpses of it sinking in. This morning, as we all left the house, Peanut & The Champ exchanged a hug and kiss goodbye without being told. It was beautiful. Yes, they will be teenagers soon enough and they will despise one another during that time, I’m sure. But I hope setting a foundation now will ensure they realize they both have something special.
Something I wish I had with my sister.